The Essence of Wondering Why
Like most news junkies, rolling reports in the background are a given. Though très depressing that the teeny 1% of the broadcast that screams HOPE is lost in a miasmic minute, those 60 seconds speak LIFE, so I'm all for it!
Truth is, I’m no stranger to doom and gloom. Lived it, breathed it...pretty much relished it. When you expect everything to go wrong, you don't lose any sleep when it does. Business as usual.
And in disaster's downtime? No such thing! It's always ready for your embrace. Like anger. Never more than a whisper away.
Hence, hearing Gregg Matte speak of "revenge conversations in your mind", had me fall about laughing. Because for a long while - a lifetime ago, I hasten to add! - that was me. Angry with life, the world, and everyone in it.
Ever wondered how thespians acquired that moniker? Well, a chap called Thespis was a 6th century Greek poet who distinguished himself by being the first person to appear on stage as a character in a play rather than just an orator.
He then introduced a novel approach: one actor who performed the words of all the characters, differentiated only by the wearing of masks. It was called tragedy.
Hmmm...! Do you see it?!
Revenge conversations involve more than one person. When you play any/all of those other people as well as yourself, you basically put words in their mouths. Your words, inclinations, and choices. A lengthy tunnel of assumption and self-satisfaction which inevitably leads to pain.
I won't lie; it was a heady, exhilarating, anger-fuelled ride whilst it lasted.
However, realising that nothing good or bad that befell me was actually about me, made the fumes disperse and everything fall into place.
My expectations are superfluous to requirements. In God’s big picture, His purposes take centre-stage. With me a mere bit player - waiting in the wings to play the role He’s assigned me.
Like love, peace comes slowly, but oh the joyous relief.
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📖 My dear friends, you should be quick to listen and slow to speak or to get angry. If you are angry, you cannot do any of the good things God wants done. - James 1:19-20 CEV
🎤 YouVersion plan: Why Are You So Mad by Gregg Matte