The day a podiatrist told me to stop doing Aerobics was one of the happiest days of my life! I tried very hard to hide my glee, but I'm quite sure he caught it. Nonetheless, I managed a tortured, "Oh no! I love my Aerobics class!!" For effect. ⠀

Who knew that when Benjamin Disraeli said that, "there are lies, damn lies, and statistics", one ultra-fib would embody all three degrees of his statement? ⠀

I hated Aerobics with a passion. The only reason I signed up - apart from woefully failing the BMI test - was because the classes were held at lunchtime in my office building. I had no more excuses. Plus, it seemed like a no-brainer: skip lunch, and exercise instead. Size next-to-nothing was tantalisingly close. ⠀

Ha! Famous last words. It was punishment for every bad thing I'd ever done. And that list was a long one. A half-hearted longing for spiritual catharsis aside, knowing I was overweight largely because I ate things like doughnuts instead of cereal for breakfast, I threw myself wholeheartedly into it. ⠀

After a shower, I'd practically crawl back to my desk; panting and needing a full body massage.

Alistair - my long-suffering line-manager - thought it was hilarious. It wasn't. I not only needed to be seen to be getting into shape, I also had to justify the obscene amount of money I'd spent on exercise gear.

The shop assistant (definitely working on commission) had looked as if she'd just seen her horse cross the finish line when she rang up my purchases.Bottom line, there was a lot on the line. ⠀

Looking back now, I remember Alistair saying something that was very true but that I wasn't ready to hear: "You do know that you don't have to do this...?!" At which point I asked him what size his girlfriend was, and what size I was. He totally missed the sarcasm in my voice and was about to answer when out of the corner of my eye, I spied one of the other guys shaking his head vigorously and repeatedly mouthing the word, "No!" Suffice to say, he had a lucky escape. ⠀

Truth be told though, he was right as then, it was all about image for me. I needed to look the part, conveniently forgetting that my crazy lifestyle of long hours, little sleep, breakfast and lunch at my desk, and countless restaurant suppers that did not in any way or manner feature salads, were a big red flag. ⠀

Today, it brings to mind all the different things we do because we think we should or have to be doing them, rather than having a cogent reason.

Why do we bow to the expectations of family, friends, and society in general? Good health is obviously justified, but many other rationalisations are unreasonable, quite unnecessary, and often very dangerous - to both mind and body. ⠀

I once chatted with a woman who had been married for fifteen years and said her husband had never seen her without make-up. She took it off when he fell asleep and put it on again before he woke up. I spent the rest of the conversation trying to calculate how many hours of sleep she actually got and wondering whether she had to drug him when her exhaustion levels reached critical heights. ⠀

We have a whole new generation of young people striving to reach sometimes impossible targets. Not because they're not smart enough or good enough or anything else the Enemy whispers in their ears. But simply because it's not the right time or path. Yet seems to be an evil word.

We work so hard to acquire, there is no time to enjoy the new people and/or possessions we think will "complete" us; in our own eyes and that of the world.

The great job or thriving business. The fantastic car. The architectural masterpiece. Multiple holidays in faraway exotic places. The fabulous spouse and 2.4 perfectly-behaved and upwardly-mobile children... That must-have-must-do attitude comes at a high price. ⠀

However much we'd like to forget all the times we failed, or just scraped through, it behoves us to be honest and tell our children and mentees that it's okay not to have it all or do it all or die trying.

That every assumed 'imperfection' and 'short-falling' has already been taken into account; any perception of shame nailed to the cross through the hands and feet of a Saviour who loves us just as we are.

Rich, poor; successful, struggling; plump, slim; beautiful, plain; fashionable, dowdy; popular, obscure; married, single; top dog, pleb; movie star, b-lister; or - Lord help us - fruitful, barren. ⠀

Lies. Danm lies. And statistics. Which suggest that 1 in 50 people suffer from body dysmorphia; and further, 1 in 6 people experience anxiety and depression - largely stemming from inadequacy and worthlessness. Are the things we are striving for and worrying about really that important? ⠀

It may be time to put an abrupt and permanent end to anything that is unnatural, stressful, and ultimately of no eternal use.

I've learnt to love the peaks and troughs in my continuous weight loss journey. It is what it is. I'm not even sure that many people notice. If they do, I could do with some of the spare time they have on their hands. ⠀

For me, the main thing is there are folks who love and appreciate me - and indeed us all - without the bells and whistles.

More importantly, God accepts us just as we are. Perfect in the eyes of the only One who matters. I'll settle for that - all day, every day.

#Psalm139:13-18 ⠀