For years

I longed to "go home".

Stomping ground of

A happy childhood

Countless fun times

Important life lessons

Pampering, privilege

Family, friends

Acquaintances, foes

All beckoning with

The promise of

Tranquillity and

Sanctuary from the fray.

However, on returning

I saw that

Everything I yearned for

Was in a place

That only existed

In my mind.

Everyone

The same

But strangely

Different

Diffidence and boldness

Had blithely

Swapped places

Inexplicably

Leaving me in

An unfathomable

Though oddly

Bearable

Place called

No-man's land.

●

What then to do?

How best to

Embrace

This somewhat

Unwelcome evolution?

Learn how to

Delight in the

"Mundane" present?

Nervously, eagerly

Anticipate the wonders

Of the morrow?

You see

No matter how much

I longed to

Welcome it back

I had not glanced

Over my shoulder

And found an

Ever elusive yore

Gaining on me

For outside of

My subconscious,

Though it

Nipped at my heels

It had

No power to do so.

Each bite was

Always hesitant -

Simply waiting

For me to

Capitulate

By sinking deep

Into memory's

Melancholic grip,

Subtly disguised

As a clasp d'amour

Ready to wring

Reason, logic

And the hope of

What could be

Out of me

●

No Hobson's choice

It was instead

Free will's

Reminder

That to

Take advantage

Of the future

I had to savour

The right now

Forget the had been

Rock steadily

Back and forth

In the wonder of today

Embracing God's

Love, provision

Mercy, grace

And awesome plan.

What pain

There was

Would dull,

The laughter

Become a pleasant

Yet faint memory,

Any lingering expectations

Still unmet

Chalked down

To a lack

Of understanding

And experience;

Relationships

Ordered then reordered

Ad infinitum;

Each minute spent

Tilting on the

Edge of destiny:

Fulfilment a subtle

Whisper away...

On leaving

The past

Behind.

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#TheNowAndHereafter

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📖 “I am not saying that I have already reached that place in my life. I have not yet completely become the person that God wants me to be. But I am trying very hard to reach that place. That was Christ's purpose when he first made me his own. My Christian friends, I do not think that I have reached that place yet. But this is what I do: I do not think about past things that have already happened. Instead, I try hard to reach the things that are in front of me.”

Philippians 3:12-13 EASY (YouVersion)

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